Deena & Jim
🇳🇱 TOP 100#1
🇧🇪 ULTRATOP (V)#84
Studio Album
12 tracks
54:52
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About the album
Deena & Jim is one of the more ambitious projects in Anouk's catalogue, combining her songwriting with Martin Gjerstad and orchestral arrangements performed by the Prague Philharmonic Orchestra.
Anouk originally considered calling the album For Those Who Wait, but chose Deena & Jim after discovering that title had already been used. She explained that the names fit because much of the album deals with relationships.
The songs were written with longtime collaborator Martin Gjerstad, usually starting from piano. Anouk described their writing chemistry as strong, with short sessions sometimes producing several songs.
The orchestral sound reflects Anouk's wish to challenge herself and make something that was not especially common in contemporary pop or rock.
Its cinematic character was also shaped by Anouk's love of film, especially the way music, visuals and atmosphere can come together.
Although Anouk does not consider Deena & Jim a concept album, its twelve tracks are meant to be heard as one work, balancing orchestral arrangements with love, loss and reflection.
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Tracklist
12 tracks · 54:52Click a title to view the lyrics
1
03:56
From the bottom to the top
You're making my heart drop so fast, so fast
From the bottom to the top
You're making my heart drop so fast, so fast
How I miss your sweet embrace
Feeling lonesome at our place
Haunted by doubts, I'm terrified
Loving you tears me apart
You left a hole in my heart
And of this I cannot lie
From the bottom to the top
You're making my heart drop so fast, so fast
From the bottom to the top
You're still making my heart drop so fast, so fast
Keep on loving me
And I'll keep on loving you
'Cause you know what they say
Sunshine comes to all that feel the rain
From the bottom to the top
You're making my heart drop so fast, so fast
From the bottom to the top
You're still making my heart drop so fast, so fast
You're making my heart drop so fast, so fast
From the bottom to the top
You're making my heart drop so fast, so fast
How I miss your sweet embrace
Feeling lonesome at our place
Haunted by doubts, I'm terrified
Loving you tears me apart
You left a hole in my heart
And of this I cannot lie
From the bottom to the top
You're making my heart drop so fast, so fast
From the bottom to the top
You're still making my heart drop so fast, so fast
Keep on loving me
And I'll keep on loving you
'Cause you know what they say
Sunshine comes to all that feel the rain
From the bottom to the top
You're making my heart drop so fast, so fast
From the bottom to the top
You're still making my heart drop so fast, so fast
2
03:37
It looks like I'm broken
But I will be fine
Always leaving the spot where I am behind
No matter what I will never escape
So I just pretend to fly far away
Trying to hide in this fantasy
Closing my eyes to reality
Are you done running
Are you done
Too fast, too fast
You better slow down
At last, at last
I just wanna be found
Are you done running
Are you done
I'm so tired of running
And what lies ahead
I look at the stars, it's bringing me back
Sailin' the high waves, now where can I go
People around me, I still feel alone
I'm trying to hide in this fantasy
Closing my eyes to reality
Are you done running
Are you done
Too fast, too fast
You better slow down
At last, at last
I just wanna be found
Are you done running
Are you done
Are you done running
Are you done
Beyond the birds
And through the skies and stars
But do I really know
I can only go so far
Are you done running
Are you done, are you done
Are you done running
Are you done, are you done
But I will be fine
Always leaving the spot where I am behind
No matter what I will never escape
So I just pretend to fly far away
Trying to hide in this fantasy
Closing my eyes to reality
Are you done running
Are you done
Too fast, too fast
You better slow down
At last, at last
I just wanna be found
Are you done running
Are you done
I'm so tired of running
And what lies ahead
I look at the stars, it's bringing me back
Sailin' the high waves, now where can I go
People around me, I still feel alone
I'm trying to hide in this fantasy
Closing my eyes to reality
Are you done running
Are you done
Too fast, too fast
You better slow down
At last, at last
I just wanna be found
Are you done running
Are you done
Are you done running
Are you done
Beyond the birds
And through the skies and stars
But do I really know
I can only go so far
Are you done running
Are you done, are you done
Are you done running
Are you done, are you done
3
04:45
Rivers started flowing
The sky was turning black and seasons changed
Frozen by confusion
I hardly recognized you in this state
Is this what you wanted
'Cause this is what you left behind
I've hit the ground and fallen so hard
It got you this time
Damage done, now ain't this fun, it's over
Ooh, where you go, ooh, I won't go
Damage done, now ain't this fun, it's broken
Ooh, where you go, ooh, I won't go no more
Wasn't there enough blood
The blade too blunt to cut
You ran around
Stepping on their hearts
Crushing their homes
They're not a playground
Replaying this song
Erasing every word
I'm unable to, to move on
I wish I knew a way not to like you anymore
Damage done, now ain't this fun, it's over
Ooh, where you go, ooh, I won't go
Damage done, now ain't this fun, it's all broken
Ooh, where you go, I won't, I won't go no more
Darkness of the skies
It's all that you chase
It's painted on your face
Damage done, now ain't this fun, it's over
Ooh, where you go, ooh, I won't go
Damage done, now ain't this fun, it's all broken
Ooh, where you go, I won't, I won't go no more
The sky was turning black and seasons changed
Frozen by confusion
I hardly recognized you in this state
Is this what you wanted
'Cause this is what you left behind
I've hit the ground and fallen so hard
It got you this time
Damage done, now ain't this fun, it's over
Ooh, where you go, ooh, I won't go
Damage done, now ain't this fun, it's broken
Ooh, where you go, ooh, I won't go no more
Wasn't there enough blood
The blade too blunt to cut
You ran around
Stepping on their hearts
Crushing their homes
They're not a playground
Replaying this song
Erasing every word
I'm unable to, to move on
I wish I knew a way not to like you anymore
Damage done, now ain't this fun, it's over
Ooh, where you go, ooh, I won't go
Damage done, now ain't this fun, it's all broken
Ooh, where you go, I won't, I won't go no more
Darkness of the skies
It's all that you chase
It's painted on your face
Damage done, now ain't this fun, it's over
Ooh, where you go, ooh, I won't go
Damage done, now ain't this fun, it's all broken
Ooh, where you go, I won't, I won't go no more
4
04:41
Deena and Jim mostly hated themselves for things
Things they've never said, stuck in their heads
They're walking on pins and needles, a mental strain
Until the clouds began to rain
Someday they will learn the golden rule
Of love and care, instead of being a fool
There was nothing else to do but say goodbye
From the tears that fell and this rage inside
Deep down they felt an empty space
And realized that they could not replace
Something in a secret way finally helped them see
That without this love they will both be free
Free from the lies, free from growing pain
Free from being the fools they became
'Cause they were letting the anger in, 'till it built up
Now they lighten their heavy hearts
Someday they will learn the golden rule
To love and care, instead of being a fool
There was nothing else to do but say goodbye
From the tears that fell and the rage inside
Deep down they felt an empty space
And realized that they could not replace
Something in a secret way finally helped them see
That without this love they will both be free
Things they've never said, stuck in their heads
They're walking on pins and needles, a mental strain
Until the clouds began to rain
Someday they will learn the golden rule
Of love and care, instead of being a fool
There was nothing else to do but say goodbye
From the tears that fell and this rage inside
Deep down they felt an empty space
And realized that they could not replace
Something in a secret way finally helped them see
That without this love they will both be free
Free from the lies, free from growing pain
Free from being the fools they became
'Cause they were letting the anger in, 'till it built up
Now they lighten their heavy hearts
Someday they will learn the golden rule
To love and care, instead of being a fool
There was nothing else to do but say goodbye
From the tears that fell and the rage inside
Deep down they felt an empty space
And realized that they could not replace
Something in a secret way finally helped them see
That without this love they will both be free
5
03:38
Why do you hurt me so badly
Is there nothing I can do to make it stop
Is causing me pain helping you feeling safe
My love, my love
You load up your bullets and fire
Piercing my skin, straight to my heart
Which tells me no, but my mind won't let go
My love, my love
No longer I fight back when you're here
Have I ever done you wrong
Why do you hate me so much
What did I do to deserve all of this
Why do you hate me so
My eyes, once happy, look hollow
I'm not even sure who I am anymore
It becomes harder to hide
It's festered inside
My love
Quietly falling apart
Darkness has taken control of your heart
It's not how it used to be
It's in your eyes
My love
No longer I fight back when you're here
Have I ever done you wrong
Why, why do you hate me so much
What did I do to deserve all of this
Why do you hate me so
So now each time when you walk by
I'm acting as if I am blind
I only do this because you hurt me so deep inside
Why, why do you hate me so much
What did I do to deserve all of this
Why do you hate me so
Is there nothing I can do to make it stop
Is causing me pain helping you feeling safe
My love, my love
You load up your bullets and fire
Piercing my skin, straight to my heart
Which tells me no, but my mind won't let go
My love, my love
No longer I fight back when you're here
Have I ever done you wrong
Why do you hate me so much
What did I do to deserve all of this
Why do you hate me so
My eyes, once happy, look hollow
I'm not even sure who I am anymore
It becomes harder to hide
It's festered inside
My love
Quietly falling apart
Darkness has taken control of your heart
It's not how it used to be
It's in your eyes
My love
No longer I fight back when you're here
Have I ever done you wrong
Why, why do you hate me so much
What did I do to deserve all of this
Why do you hate me so
So now each time when you walk by
I'm acting as if I am blind
I only do this because you hurt me so deep inside
Why, why do you hate me so much
What did I do to deserve all of this
Why do you hate me so
6
06:59
When I die
I will miss you, but I
I won't be missing this world we're in
So don't shed no tears
Don't feel sorry
Or cry for me leaving you behind
No place, no time
Belongs to the world
When for the last time
I close my eyes, and I know
No place, no time
It will be alright
As I will be leaving back home
Watch me rise
And you will see me
When the sun sets or when the moon goes down
Don't say goodbye
'Cause I ain't leaving
I will be waiting for you back in paradise
No place, no time
Belongs to the world
And for the last time
I close my eyes, and I know
No place, no time
It will be alright
'Cause I will be leaving back home
I'll be the sunlight on the grain
That lonely bird in flight
The gentle autumn rain
I'll be gone but I didn't die
No I, I'll be all the winds that blow
I'll be the diamond in the snow
And the stars that shine at night
So don't cry
No place, no time
It will be alright
'Cause I will be leaving back home
I will be leaving back home
I will miss you, but I
I won't be missing this world we're in
So don't shed no tears
Don't feel sorry
Or cry for me leaving you behind
No place, no time
Belongs to the world
When for the last time
I close my eyes, and I know
No place, no time
It will be alright
As I will be leaving back home
Watch me rise
And you will see me
When the sun sets or when the moon goes down
Don't say goodbye
'Cause I ain't leaving
I will be waiting for you back in paradise
No place, no time
Belongs to the world
And for the last time
I close my eyes, and I know
No place, no time
It will be alright
'Cause I will be leaving back home
I'll be the sunlight on the grain
That lonely bird in flight
The gentle autumn rain
I'll be gone but I didn't die
No I, I'll be all the winds that blow
I'll be the diamond in the snow
And the stars that shine at night
So don't cry
No place, no time
It will be alright
'Cause I will be leaving back home
I will be leaving back home
7
04:48
What happened
When did you get so unhappy
Why don't you get the old out
And replace them with the new
Now go and find your blue
Keep on driving
To let your mind astray
No city walls under grey skies
Drive to more like an open space
'Cause everything you are will be lost
You will never outshine the sky's own blue
It's nothing more than losing your all
One day they will stop thinking 'bout you
'Cause everything will be lost
You wanted magic
Two lovers in the sky
The grass so tall, it's reaching the clouds
Where you both whisper to rivers of time
But everything you are will be lost
You will never outshine the sky's own blue
It's nothing more than losing your all
One day they'll just stop thinking 'bout you
Everything will be lost
Your heart and soul
Always in for new highs
Wishing you could stay
Where weed grows wild
Everything you are will be lost someday
Everything you are will be lost someday
Everything you are will be lost someday
Everything you are will be lost
Everything, everything
Everything will be lost
Everything, everything
When did you get so unhappy
Why don't you get the old out
And replace them with the new
Now go and find your blue
Keep on driving
To let your mind astray
No city walls under grey skies
Drive to more like an open space
'Cause everything you are will be lost
You will never outshine the sky's own blue
It's nothing more than losing your all
One day they will stop thinking 'bout you
'Cause everything will be lost
You wanted magic
Two lovers in the sky
The grass so tall, it's reaching the clouds
Where you both whisper to rivers of time
But everything you are will be lost
You will never outshine the sky's own blue
It's nothing more than losing your all
One day they'll just stop thinking 'bout you
Everything will be lost
Your heart and soul
Always in for new highs
Wishing you could stay
Where weed grows wild
Everything you are will be lost someday
Everything you are will be lost someday
Everything you are will be lost someday
Everything you are will be lost
Everything, everything
Everything will be lost
Everything, everything
8
04:01
If only you could read my mind
If only you could see what happens inside
'Cause sometimes it's a terrible place
I found out, it's the only way
If only you knew what I'm feeling
'Cause my mind plays tricks on me
My mind is blown, one of its own
The only thing that keeps me here
Are feelings that bind my soul
Now why do I stay where I don't belong
Why do I stay where I don't belong
If only you could read the signs
Then I wouldn't have to lie all of the time
'Cause my mind is like a loaded gun
Breaking me even further down
If only you knew what I'm feeling
'Cause my mind plays tricks on me
My mind is blown, one of its own
The only thing that keeps me here
Are feelings that bind my soul
Now why do I stay where I don't belong
Not that it makes a difference, I don't care
Sometimes it's a terrible place
And I see a demon with red eyes on its face
Sometimes, sometimes
Sometimes it's a terrible place
If only you could see what happens inside
'Cause sometimes it's a terrible place
I found out, it's the only way
If only you knew what I'm feeling
'Cause my mind plays tricks on me
My mind is blown, one of its own
The only thing that keeps me here
Are feelings that bind my soul
Now why do I stay where I don't belong
Why do I stay where I don't belong
If only you could read the signs
Then I wouldn't have to lie all of the time
'Cause my mind is like a loaded gun
Breaking me even further down
If only you knew what I'm feeling
'Cause my mind plays tricks on me
My mind is blown, one of its own
The only thing that keeps me here
Are feelings that bind my soul
Now why do I stay where I don't belong
Not that it makes a difference, I don't care
Sometimes it's a terrible place
And I see a demon with red eyes on its face
Sometimes, sometimes
Sometimes it's a terrible place
9
03:56
Am I still alive
I can't feel a thing
Did I just hit the ground
I'm left far behind
Fading from their minds
Is this my way out
My future hopes and longing dreams
Are no longer in my life
And the person that I used to be
Vanished now from sight
Now I'm an old broken ride
The one needs fixing
Old broken ride
I see new rides shining
They're all around me, they're blinding
I see these new rides shining
But I can't ride a new one anymore
So it has been an uphill climb
I didn't make it here with ease
No I struggled through some desperate times
Through raging storms and seas
I'm an old broken ride
The one needs fixing
Old broken ride
I see new rides shining
They're all around me, they're blinding
I see these new rides shining
But I can't ride a new one anymore
No more gold, no medals
Or my name up in the lights
I've loved and lost and sacrificed
Not perfect but I try
I've got nothing to lose
I've got nothing to prove
Now that I'm an old broken ride
The one needs fixing
Old broken ride
I see new rides shining
They're all around me, they're blinding
I see these new rides shining
But I can't ride a new one anymore
Anymore, anymore
Is this my way out
I can't feel a thing
Did I just hit the ground
I'm left far behind
Fading from their minds
Is this my way out
My future hopes and longing dreams
Are no longer in my life
And the person that I used to be
Vanished now from sight
Now I'm an old broken ride
The one needs fixing
Old broken ride
I see new rides shining
They're all around me, they're blinding
I see these new rides shining
But I can't ride a new one anymore
So it has been an uphill climb
I didn't make it here with ease
No I struggled through some desperate times
Through raging storms and seas
I'm an old broken ride
The one needs fixing
Old broken ride
I see new rides shining
They're all around me, they're blinding
I see these new rides shining
But I can't ride a new one anymore
No more gold, no medals
Or my name up in the lights
I've loved and lost and sacrificed
Not perfect but I try
I've got nothing to lose
I've got nothing to prove
Now that I'm an old broken ride
The one needs fixing
Old broken ride
I see new rides shining
They're all around me, they're blinding
I see these new rides shining
But I can't ride a new one anymore
Anymore, anymore
Is this my way out
10
04:28
Each time you work around the clock
To find out whether you're loved
You stumble to find a way
Far from feelings of pain
It took away your yellow
Little by little
It took away your yellow
Childhood's over
And one way or another
It was going to end like that long last lover
Empty bottles are building up
They're getting too heavy on your heart
Way too heavy on your heart
In the end it's all about memories
But life went straight for your heart
You're not aware of your wicked family
But you were fucked from the start
It took away your yellow
Little by little
It took away your yellow
Childhood's over
And one way or another
It was going to end like that long last lover
Empty bottles are building up
They're getting too heavy on your heart
Way too heavy on your heart
Straight for your heart
One way or another
You were fucked from the start
Childhood's over
Childhood's over
Childhood's over
Childhood's over
It took away your yellow
To find out whether you're loved
You stumble to find a way
Far from feelings of pain
It took away your yellow
Little by little
It took away your yellow
Childhood's over
And one way or another
It was going to end like that long last lover
Empty bottles are building up
They're getting too heavy on your heart
Way too heavy on your heart
In the end it's all about memories
But life went straight for your heart
You're not aware of your wicked family
But you were fucked from the start
It took away your yellow
Little by little
It took away your yellow
Childhood's over
And one way or another
It was going to end like that long last lover
Empty bottles are building up
They're getting too heavy on your heart
Way too heavy on your heart
Straight for your heart
One way or another
You were fucked from the start
Childhood's over
Childhood's over
Childhood's over
Childhood's over
It took away your yellow
11
04:46
I suppose there are disagreements, but I can
I can still remember who we were
Who we were before we forgot
There we go, round and round we walk straight to the point
Of who will decide what's fair or not
In our minds we are both free
It's all we got
Let us agree to disagree
Don't make a problem, 'cause we won't succeed
Oh why do we keep losing our minds?
And all of our fates are just the same
Don't point your finger, I'll take the blame
Let's try, solutions are here to find
'Cause heaven should be on our minds
Memories, they can turn to something like daydreams
Now we're under shimmering shades of blue
Does your heart miss mine and feel so lost too?
Oh, please don't let this be the fall of the dreams we have
Of you and me making it through it all
Forget wrong or right
Don't wait for us to fall
Let us agree to disagree
Don't make a problem, 'cause we won't succeed
Oh why do we keep losing our minds
And all of our fates, are just the same
Don't point your finger, no I'll take the blame
Let's try, solutions are here to find
Heaven should be on our minds
On our minds
I can still remember who we were
Who we were before we forgot
There we go, round and round we walk straight to the point
Of who will decide what's fair or not
In our minds we are both free
It's all we got
Let us agree to disagree
Don't make a problem, 'cause we won't succeed
Oh why do we keep losing our minds?
And all of our fates are just the same
Don't point your finger, I'll take the blame
Let's try, solutions are here to find
'Cause heaven should be on our minds
Memories, they can turn to something like daydreams
Now we're under shimmering shades of blue
Does your heart miss mine and feel so lost too?
Oh, please don't let this be the fall of the dreams we have
Of you and me making it through it all
Forget wrong or right
Don't wait for us to fall
Let us agree to disagree
Don't make a problem, 'cause we won't succeed
Oh why do we keep losing our minds
And all of our fates, are just the same
Don't point your finger, no I'll take the blame
Let's try, solutions are here to find
Heaven should be on our minds
On our minds
12
05:17
You took a piece of me, and I let you
You just taught me how to hate myself
Sometimes I regret the day that I met you
You left me at my lowest on the shelf
I know I got one life
But I want somebody else's sometimes
One day at a time
You are after another life
And I am
Stuck in the one you left behind
I'm buried under sheets, I know this is stupid
And there is gonna be no shortcuts out
It's like a tunnel baby, I gotta walk through it
And I will not turn back around
'Cause there's nothing back there
And all I see is pitch black ahead
One day at a time
You are after another life
And I am
Stuck in the one you left
One day at a time
You are after another life
And I am
Stuck in the one you left behind
Time waits for no man
One of these days will be yesterday
It takes so long when the heart's not brave
Time waits for no man
I'm keeping my calm, when I'm not strong
And try to stay sweet under wrong
One day at a time
You are after another life
And I am
Stuck in the one you left
One day at a time
I am after another life
And I'll be
Stuck in the one that I will find
One day at a time
You just taught me how to hate myself
Sometimes I regret the day that I met you
You left me at my lowest on the shelf
I know I got one life
But I want somebody else's sometimes
One day at a time
You are after another life
And I am
Stuck in the one you left behind
I'm buried under sheets, I know this is stupid
And there is gonna be no shortcuts out
It's like a tunnel baby, I gotta walk through it
And I will not turn back around
'Cause there's nothing back there
And all I see is pitch black ahead
One day at a time
You are after another life
And I am
Stuck in the one you left
One day at a time
You are after another life
And I am
Stuck in the one you left behind
Time waits for no man
One of these days will be yesterday
It takes so long when the heart's not brave
Time waits for no man
I'm keeping my calm, when I'm not strong
And try to stay sweet under wrong
One day at a time
You are after another life
And I am
Stuck in the one you left
One day at a time
I am after another life
And I'll be
Stuck in the one that I will find
One day at a time
Note
All songs written by A. Schemmekes.
Releases
4 editions
Deena & Jim · Studio Album · 2023
Published by
Goldilox Publishing / BMG Talpa Music B.V.
Produced by
Anouk Schemmekes
Vocals
Anouk Schemmekes
Piano
Martin Gjerstad
Orchestra
The City of Prague Philharmonic Orchestra
Orchestra Leader
Adam Klemens
Orchestra Arrangements
Martin Gjerstad
Additional Programming
Christiaan van der Laan
Music Recorded by
Christiaan van der Laan and Jens Lindgård at Gula Studion
Orchestra Recorded by
Jan Holzner at Smecky Music Studio
Vocals Recorded by
Jens Lindgård at Gula Studion and Rob de Nijs at A60 Studio
Vocals Edited by
John Sonneveld at The Bunker Wisseloord
Mixed by
Robin Hunt at Studio Atlas Herzberg
Mastered by
Robin Schmidt at 24-96 Mastering
Photography
Erwin Olaf
Design
Valentin Ocheda
From the Bottom to the Top
Songwriting
Lyrics By
Anouk Schemmekes
Music By
Anouk Schemmekes, Martin Gjerstad and Ella Sahlin
Are You Done Running
Songwriting
Lyrics By
Anouk Schemmekes
Music By
Anouk Schemmekes and Martin Gjerstad
Damage Done
Songwriting
Lyrics By
Anouk Schemmekes
Music By
Anouk Schemmekes and Martin Gjerstad
Deena & Jim
Songwriting
Lyrics By
Anouk Schemmekes
Music By
Anouk Schemmekes and Martin Gjerstad
Why Do You Hate Me so Much
Songwriting
Lyrics By
Anouk Schemmekes
Music By
Anouk Schemmekes and Martin Gjerstad
When I Die
Songwriting
Lyrics By
Anouk Schemmekes
Music By
Anouk Schemmekes and Martin Gjerstad
Everything You Are Will Be Lost
Songwriting
Lyrics By
Anouk Schemmekes
Music By
Anouk Schemmekes, Martin Gjerstad and Bart de Ruiter
If Only
Songwriting
Lyrics By
Anouk Schemmekes
Music By
Anouk Schemmekes and Martin Gjerstad
Old Broken Ride
Songwriting
Lyrics By
Anouk Schemmekes
Music By
Anouk Schemmekes and Martin Gjerstad
Childhood's Over
Songwriting
Lyrics By
Anouk Schemmekes
Music By
Anouk Schemmekes and Martin Gjerstad
Agree to Disagree
Songwriting
Lyrics By
Anouk Schemmekes
Music By
Anouk Schemmekes, Martin Gjerstad and Tore Johansson
One Day at a Time
Songwriting
Lyrics By
Anouk Schemmekes
Music By
Anouk Schemmekes and Martin Gjerstad